by Mark Bowness

What does it mean to live the life that you were created to live?

on January 12, 2016

It’s an awesome question… Probably one of the best that you have ever asked. I have committed my life to empowering as many people as possible to life the life that they were created to live, it fuels me every single day, it’s what I exist for. But, what the hell does it mean… To live the life that you were created to live?

Now, for one minute I want you to imagine a world in which every individual was living the life that they were created to live. What would this practically mean?

  • Limitless happiness? (Irrespective of the positive or challenging situations that we encounter)
  • A greater sense of community and connection?
  • Many of the problems that we find in the world, solved?
  • A passion within you to wake up every single day and to live the most incredible life?
  • To live passionately, to love endlessly, to commit yourself to your own growth and to positively contribute to the world.
  • Ultimately, every individual living, leading and leaving a life changing legacy.

Doesn’t that pretty much excite the hell out of you in the same way that it does me?

We were each created for the most amazing purpose. You have been placed upon planet earth to be uniquely you. No one else has the skills the resources and the experience to do what you were placed upon planet earth to do. No one.

The reality is that we see many of the world’s problems around us – homelessness, lack of employment, lack of money, terminal illnesses of which there are no cures for. I believe that within human beings is the answer to those problems, within you is the solution to a problem on planet earth, if only you were living your full potential.

What stops people from living out their full potential?

Again, another great question! Every single being has needs that are required to be fulfilled in order for them to function efficiently. These needs are:

Certainty: We each need to feel certain about the things that we need in our lives to sustain us whether this be money, a house, food, warmth. These elements are fundamental to our survival.

Significance: a need to feel unique, important, special and needed.

Variety/Uncertainty: The need for the unknown, change, new stimuli.

Love and Connection: The need of a strong feeling of closeness, or bond with someone or something such as a partner or religious belief.

Growth: An expansion of capacity, capability or understanding.

Contribution: a sense of giving back to the world, of leaving a legacy so that your time on earth was “about something”.

These needs are important to the development of every single human being. However, if these needs are sought to be fulfilled from the lowest version of ourselves they are destructive. For example, if we steal money in order to get food on the table then we are not operating out of the highest version of ourselves and so we are not growing or contributing. If, in order fulfil our need for significant we put other people down we are not living in a way that is best for our ecology (in that our behaviour is good for us and for those around us).

The first four needs (Certainty, Significance, Variety and Love and Connection) are the needs that we need to meet first in order to then reach growth and connection which are classed as our spiritual needs. If we continually meet these first four needs from the lowest version of ourselves we are so consumed with our own needs, our own desires and wants that are vision and passion to grow and contribute doesn’t exist, we are simply operating out of survival.

Let’s consider Anne for the moment. Anne is married with 4 children, her husband works long hours and her children can be a bit of a handful. Because Anne does not see her husband as much as she would like to she craves love and connection and so in order to meet this need Anne spends a lot of time gossiping about her friends, family and those in the community. When Anne spends time gossiping she feels as though it gives her a sense of connection with those that she is gossiping with, however, as a result of her gossiping Anne has spread a few rumours that have hurt many people in her community. In this way Anne is not growing and she is not contributing and she seems stuck in this gossiping loop and is never fully living the life that she was created to live as a result.

The No.1 key to fulfilling our human needs and contributing to the world in the most amazing way is…

To approach the fulfilment of each of our human needs with super love.

Let’s delve a little deeper…

Super means of a “higher kind”. And so super love is the ultimate non-judgement, non-egocentric love towards ourselves and those around us. In this way if we approach the fulfilment of our human needs with an attitude of super love we are acting in a way that shows compassion, concern and care for ourselves and for those around us.

Let’s go back to Anne. Anne has sought to fulfil her need for love and connection through gossiping. Gossiping is destructive towards those around us and can also portray the one gossiping in a negative way that they seeks to undermine other aspects of our human needs such as love and connection. If Anne chose to operate out of super love then gossiping would not be an option. If Anne made every decision according to her desire to reflect a higher kind of love to the world she would choose to quit gossiping and would make a decision to seek significance in another way. For example, Anne could create a support group in her local community for those whose husbands spend a lot of time away from home ensuring that she gains significance in a way that is more beneficial to her and to those around her.

When we make a decision to congruently meet the first four needs of Certainty, Significance, Variety and Love and Connection from a heart of super love we then automatically meet the needs of growth and contribution. If you convey super love at the very core of who you are then your desires will be to grow and positively contribute to the world in the most incredible way.

How do YOU live the life that you were created to live?

Living life meeting your needs from a foundation of super love, from the highest possible level of love is incredibly exciting, will transform your life and will enable you to live the life that you were created to live. Now it’s time to get real and ask yourself a few questions. Ask yourself:

  1. What would you say are your two main human needs are?
  2. In what ways are you fulfilling these human needs from the lowest version of yourself?
  3. What is the one thing that you could do to fulfil each of these human needs out of a heart of super love?

Now, comment below and share with the community what your biggest outtake from this article has been? Can’t wait to read them.

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  • Sam Davies

    Seriously powerful post Mark that has challenged me to the core. I run my life based upon what I want in order to meet my needs and I realise now that if I am not growing, I am dying! Thank you for opening my eyes.

  • Lisa Harvey

    Thank You Mark. My two most important human needs are that of Love and Connection and Significance and now I see that these two conflict each other. When I don’t get love and connection from my partner I realise that I cause an argument so that I feel significant. Now I am aware of this… I can change it. Wow.